Degrees in something useless --

I don't understand why people get degrees in something that they can never get a job in. Why do you spend 4 long hard years in college getting a degree in history if you never have any intention of teaching history? Or people who get a degree in psychology. Unless you are going to be a doctor or counselor, this degree is not going to help you find a real job.

I also cannot stand that they complain. They complain they cannot get a job at this pharmaceutical company in sales or at this business as a computer support personnel. Well did you not think you would need at least a business degree to do that? It infuriates me.

Get a degree in something you want to do. If you don't know what to do, then get an education degree so you have something to fall back on. That is the most flexible degree. You can do a lot with it and that doesn't necessarily mean teaching children. You can work for a non-profit. They are always looking for education majors. You also can work at any company in training, teaching employees or new clients what ever that company wants. You have options.

Let's face it, you are most likely not going to be the next Van Gogh or make the NY Times Best Sellers list. A degree in English or Art is probably not going to help you get a job unless you want to teach those things and then your only option is English or Art teacher. I am not saying don't follow your dreams!!! I am saying dreams take money. Living requires money. If you cannot make a living you cannot follow your dreams. You can paint and write in your spare time. You can still follow your dreams and fulfill your goals with another degree. If you are THAT talented, you really don't need a degree in it to be successful!

Use your brain. Get a degree in something that is going to be able to earn you a living! Believe me if you don't, you will regret it.

And parents, don't let your children fall into these traps! Don't live your dreams through them. Be practical and make sure you pay for an education that your children can use.

One more note -- it is ok not to go to college. If you child doesn't want to go. Don't make them. It never works out and only wastes your money. There is nothing wrong with going to technical or vocational school! Have you seen how much mechanics and plumbers make these days? Brake a pipe or get stranded on the side of the rode and you will find out! And everyone loves to make fun of people who go to beauty school. However when you hand them $200 for 1 1/2 hours to color your hair, you change your perspective.

Do something productive, get a degree in something that can help you make a living, and you will be successful no matter what your goals in life!

I did follow my own advice

Time is money

You know I used to hear that a lot when I was young and I was like blah blah blah. But now I agree with it more than ever.

I don't have any time. Time is the thing I am always chasing anymore. Have our lives become busier? Or is there really that much more to do?

I feel like I never have a free moment. I thought with all the technology we have today we would have MORE time not less. That is not the case. I find I am more productive than I ever was, I never run out of things to do and I use every piece of technology available to make my life easier yet I am always chasing time.

Now I don't have time to blog. I should have time, I know everyone is thinking I should but I don't. School is in. I feel like I am in too. Signing up for this, volunteering for that.

And I got a blackberry to make my life easier. Yeah, I can talk on the phone and get off and e-mail and facebook and everything else but I am doing that in the middle of carpool line and while shlepping from here to there trying to get errands done. I don't have any moments of down time. When I do I look at my task list on my blackberry and find a mountain of things I haven't even considered yet. My task list is my back burner. Things that I need to do or want to do if I have 1 millisecond of free time I come across.

Is this a better way of life? Are we more productive? I eat lunch and talk on the phone or type at the same time. It never ends. I don't know if the answer is yes or no. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

And my memory. I cannot remember what happened yesterday much less last year. Ask me if I remember xyz and I can guarantee I will say no. Someone mentioned an acquaintance the other day and I SWORE I had no idea who they were talking about and she believed me. Then I was talking to another friend and mentioned it and she told me exactly who it was and how I knew her. That is not good.

I used to work a good 8 hour day. That meant I got there early and left late and put in hours on weekends sometimes when I didn't have to. And I multi-tasked and honestly did the job that would require 2 workers and when I quit, 3 were eventually hired to replace me. Not 3 one after the other, my job was split 3 ways! That was BEFORE all of this technology. Now my DH works 24/7 but still only gets paid salary.

It used to be that salary was THE way to go. All of the big jobs worked for salary. That is not so smart these days. If you are smart, you want to be paid by the hour. You want to get over time and holiday pay. That is the way to go because TIME is MONEY in this new world of technology!


Proud to punch the time clock next time --

Extremists and Alarmists and Fence Sitters

I am so blessed to have a lot of friends. Some lived in sin, gay, liberal, atheists. If you don't know me I am not gay, did not live in sin, do not consider myself liberal most of the time and I am not an atheist or agnostic or secular or whatever word makes you feel identified religiously or non-religiously.

I am trying to make a point. I love my friends equally. I don't always like what they do and I might make different decisions than they do or have past and present. I am sure they feel the same way about me and think I am insane sometimes and I probably am. I respect and admire all of my friends uniqueness. I would be bored if they were exactly like me.

And I can honestly say, I don't have a single friend who is exactly like me. I cannot believe that anyone else does either. And if you think you do, you need to broaden your horizons some.

My friends know what I think. Know I say things some times that I probably shouldn't. But they know with me, what you see if what you get. And in return I respect them in the same way. I even like to joke about how we are different or tease them about their perspective on something. That is what makes life fun and that is what I value in an individual.

However, truth be told, we are not going to all get along. There are two types of personality traits that I find hard to swallow. Alarmists, extremists and fence sitters.

Lets start with alarmists. These are the types that tell you your children are going to not be as smart or going to be obese because you gave them formula and to top it off you fed them from a bottle full of BPA. What were you thinking? Or they tell you that your shampoo is going to cause you to get cancer. The vaccines your giving your children are going to suck out their brain cells. The government is putting a chip in the H1N1 vaccine to keep track of us all by GPS.

You know the people that are constantly sounding the fire alarm but there is no fire. Yes it may be dry out or it could even be lightening but what is the probability that it is actually going to strike your house or that your dry pine straw will automatically combust? And isn't there ALWAYS a danger of fire. Theoretically what is the chance of me ever experiencing one?

And then you have the extremists. Extremist have causes. There causes are all they can talk about. They talk about it so much they turn everyone off to their cause, even those sometimes that participate or found their cause. Extremist embarrass me when they are being extreme about something that I am passionate about. Extremist embarrass everyone really and they just don't get it. They never send their cause forward, only backward.

That leads to the fence sitter. There are several types of fence sitters but I have to say fence sitters are the ones I despise the most. I would rather live with an extremist or an alarmist than a fence sitter because at least they have an opinion.

There is the fence sitter who just has no opinion. Never says anything negative or positive. They think they are being smart. Guess what? You are boring.

There is the fence sitter who listens to the right of the fence and the left of the fence. Sometimes they venture off the fence and sit in the greenest of grass with those there and say hey I am like you. Then the very next day you look across and they are sitting on the brown dried up grass and saying hey I am like you and I agree with you. They talk out of both sides of their mouths. You never know where they stand. They are really all over the place. Yet they pretend like they are sitting on the fence. Really they are playing both sides. Neither side ever respects them because no one really knows where they stand or what they are for or against. And when you say one thing and then do another, you just come out as a liar when you are probably just too unintelligent to know the difference.

But there is a far worse fence sitter. There is a fence sitter who sits and takes notes. They really belong to one side of the fence or the other but they don't want you to know which side. So they take notes and pretend to be on both sides. Then when you are not looking they go to their side of the fence and tell everyone what the other side is thinking. That side loves to hear what you have to say but don't ever expect them to trust you either. And the other side is only fooled for so long before they find out about you as well. No one likes a mole....ever.

You might not like where I am going but you sure know where I stand,

$7 can make or break you!

Way back when -- well not that far back -- I graduated from college and went on my annual retreat to Florida with my friends to celebrate the end of another school year. This time we were graduates though.

On this trip to Florida, I took pictures like always. I also had pictures from graduation and my party and all of my family who had come in to town to celebrate, etc. I had 2 rolls of 35mm film filled up. Ok, maybe this was way back when because no one had a digital camera at this time.

I took these two precious (at least to me) rolls of film to Eckerds to get processed. I was so excited to relive the memories and show my friends. I even had a coupon for free double prints which I put in one envelope with the graduation photos.

I waited my week (I think that is what you had to wait, I cannot remember anymore) and I went to pick up my pictures. The teenager behind the front quickly brought me one envelope. But I had TWO envelopes not one. I looked in this envelope and there were all of my vacation pictures with my friends but no graduation photos. I explained to him I had TWO envelopes and I had TWO tiny claim slips. He looked all over and could not find the other envelope. I was LIVID. They had lost my graduation pictures.

After talking to the store manager and him making a copy of my claim slip as I wouldn't let him "have" it to research he assured me that he would find my pictures. Yes I was almost in tears and mad, that young mad where you are just going to lose it and they knew it. He told me to return in 24 hours and he would have my lost pictures. He promised.

The teenager checked me out. I said of course you would lose the one with the coupon in it. You just want to torture me don't you? He said nothing and I paid the full price.

I of course told everyone in my path in the next 24 hours about my experience and how upset I was. I also mentioned that they had lost the one with the coupon of course as they wanted me to pay full price for these. My parents were clearly concerned as they didn't want my college pictures lost or the pictures of family that were in there.

My father decided the next day to come with me to Eckerds to see if they had my lost graduation pictures. To this day he will never go with me to Eckerds again or at least that one so I guess it is a good thing they went out of business.

We walked into the store. The store manager is there. He is smiling. I of course am frowning. I am still fuming over this whole thing. I wanted to smack his grin right off of his face. Before I can open my mouth or as I open my mouth he screams GOOD NEWS!!!! We found your pictures. I shut my mouth. I wanted the proof. I held out my hand and didn't say a word. He slid the envelope across the counter, careful not to touch me. I opened it and examined the pictures. They were there, there were double prints, my coupon was in there and all was right in the world. At least my Dad thought so.

The manager apologized to my father, to me, said he understood how important pictures were, blah blah blah. I just stared at him and said yes they are and I will never trust you with mine again that is for sure after this experience. My father looked at me like I was insane. My father said now you got your pictures, it all turned out well, trying to smooth things over. I was having nothing of it.

The manager could see I was still ticked obviously. He says listen, I am not going to charge you for these pictures. I realize we made a big mistake and caused you grief. I am sorry.

My father looked over at me smiling. I was bright red and if smoke could have come out of my ears, I would look like a chimney.

My fathers smile turned down and looked at me like what now? This is when I lost it. I really did loose my mind. I said to the manager that is fine and dandy you want to give me these pictures FREE but these were the ones that had the COUPON in them and therefore I paid full price for the others ones and I could have used this coupon on those and saved $7. So the way I see it you owe me $7.

My father was in such shock for a few minutes he didn't say a word. He was silent and I often think he was probably thinking wake up, you are dreaming, this cannot be happening. While he was silent I went round and round with the manager about how he owed me $7.

Finally my father snapped back to reality just at the time the manager was about to hand me $7 out of his own wallet just to get rid of me. He grabbed my arm, grabbed the pictures and shoved them in my direction and ushered me to the door. I was still yelling as we were going out the door.

My father asked me if I had lost my mind. I said but he owes me $7. He said he gave you the pictures FREE. What more do you expect? I said, I expect my $7. To this day I get riled up over this but laugh at the whole situation to spite myself.

In this day and age you would be happy that they offered you something free. That would be called customer service. Customer service doesn't exist anymore but it did back then. Some times you just don't know what you got till its gone.

Going to my grave with a $7 IOU from Eckerds,

Beth verses Diego Round 475867346

Our gardener drives me insane. He does things that make no sense. He claims we have a language barrier. I know he speaks English though because I talk to him in English all the time. And then when he speaks Spanish back to me I talk to him in Spanish too. We do not have a language barrier. He just hears what he wants to hear and doesn't listen to what I am saying.

Like the time he got some extra special grass seed just for me. I was so lucky. This seed is going to sprout on concrete it grows so well. This seed doesn't even need fertilizer or rain. This seed will stay green all summer long even in drought. When the seed started sprouting I realized it was Bermuda. He put Bermuda seed on my lovely green fescue that I had worked years to get right. I thought I was going to murder him. Instead he sprayed it and got rid of it very quickly thankfully.

Or the time I told him to remove two bushes in the backyard. What do you want me to do with them he asks? Well you don't even want to know what I wanted to respond to that question. But I was nice and said instead that I didn't care just get rid of them. When I came home to inspect his work he had not only dug up those two buses but two nandina that I DID NOT want dug up. And like I told him, he got rid of them. UGH!

His wife likes to call me and "translate". She is his accountant and bill collector. She wanted to know if I wanted him to seed this year. Uh, no, considering the Bermuda incident, we are going to put down our own seed. Thanks. But I would like you to come and aerate this next weekend. Well he can come in 4 weeks and aerate. NO, I want this weekend. 4 weeks it is, that sounds good. Lord, please give me the patience, the strength, -- I said, I will compromise with you. How about 2 weeks? She says alright 2 weeks. I said don't you remember last year when you said 1 week and it turned into 4 weeks because he couldn't get the aerator machine because they were all booked up. She ignores me.

This is how all of my communication goes with them. I swear he does things just to annoy me. This weekend I wanted him to plant some bushes and trees in the yard. The bushes that I had to replace because he pulled some up he was not supposed to. Well I plan on this for Saturday as he comes every Saturday morning for the past year. Well wouldn't you know it, the minute I decide to do this is the minute he decides he has plans this weekend and comes on Friday. I am going to pull my hair out.

I tell him to pull weeds. He pulls them all and then leaves the biggest one in the front center left. WTH? I am beginning to think we have a love hate relationship.

I know you wonder why I keep him around. He is a challenge and I am cheap. Plain and simple. He is cheap and I feel like it is my duty to make him a better landscaper and gardener. Plus he does allow me to boss him around when he is here so that is a bonus. There are some days that I say this is it, the last straw. Then I change my mind because I am too lazy to look for someone else and I know they will be twice as much.

This is a classic case of you get what you pay for.

The only Bermuda I better see is one that serves drinks with umbrellas,

If your gay, say it loud, say it proud, just don't NOT say it...

Let me preface this by saying I have nothing against anyone who is homosexual, lesbian, gay, or whatever you want to call it these days. But I just have to get this out already.

My gaydar became quite good once I realized what I thought was the love of my life was gay when I was in college. Let me back up a bit. When I was madly in love with him and would tell stories about him to every one and any one who would listen they always responded "he is gay". I always thought they meant he was queer or weird or they just didn't like him. I didn't take it literally. And I have to say that two people screaming it the loudest were my own father and my brother. But they said that about every guy I brought home or any guy or star that my mom and I thought was cute.

Well oddly enough the love of my life followed me to college. We quickly forgot about each other while there because there was so many fish swimming in that ocean, who needed to be involved with anyone who went to your high school, much less anyone who was from the same home town as you.

Unfortunately, he started dating a friend of mine. She even had to come up and ask me if it was ok with me. YUCK! I had no problem! I was WAY OVER that. I was mad though that she thought I cared. Well, she fell madly in love with him. She took him home to meet her parents. I think she thought he was going to be her next DH. This is when he decided to come out of the closet. Lets just say, she was not very stable to begin with and she flipped out. For real. And she blamed me. All I could say was my dad and brother always claimed he was but I had NO IDEA! The whole thing was a huge disaster as you can imagine.

Then there is another friend who is married and has two kids and her husband decided to come out of the closet and was dating a teenager from a local high school.

SERIOUSLY????

There are others as well and now some infamous ones thanks to the media. All I can say is if you are gay, or think you may be gay, decide one way or the other. If you get married, then get divorced and wait a little bit and THEN come out of the closet. If you are dating someone, break up with them and wait and then decide to announce it to the world. I don't understand doing it any other way. I know it is probably hard to realize you are gay. I know it is probably confusing. All I ask is you don't drag others down with this news.

Tuning up my gaydar,

Laughing at a Funeral

I admit I have done this. I don't know if there is ever a good reason to do this but I think in my case, the reason was pretty valid.

My grandmother died a couple of years ago very suddenly while in the hospital for a routine heart procedure. We were all very shocked and stunned as you can imagine.

The funeral was very solemn as I think we were all still in a state of unbelief. My grandmother was a wonderful woman and it was a celebration of her life. She loves to cook and many people talked about how they had benefited from her cooking no only by having a meal with her but because she donated preserves and jellies to church auctions and participated in the meals on wheels program cooking for others. She was a remarkable woman in both her community and at church.

My grandmother had many friends and one of them included my cousins grandmother. They lived in the same town and of course had known each other for years and years. Not to mention the fact that my grandmothers son, married her daughter. We called our grandma, grandma but my cousin called her grandma, Memaw, so as not to get confused. I will do from this point on as well to keep you all from getting confused.

Well, Memaw of course attended grandmas funeral. She was very sad and came to pay her respects. Now Grandma never drove but Memaw had a car and was still driving at this point. Actually she is still driving today in her 80's. She of course had drover herself to the church for the funeral as well.

We all left the church and headed in a procession for the cemetery. The immediate family was up front so we were out of our cars and standing grave side as the other cars were finishing coming in and stopping. I was standing next to my cousin waiting for the others to get to the grave site when BOOM, we heard an awful noise. We looked to the procession and wouldn't you know Memaw had hit the car in front of her. Memaw got out of the car, apologized to the people she hit, and then proclaimed she had no idea the procession had stopped. My cousin and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. And of course, once you get started, you cannot hardly stop. I thought my parents and her parents were going to kill us. We had tears running down our faces, not tears of sadness and grief, but tears of pure exhaustion from hysteria.

Now looking back on this a few minutes later when we were eating at the wake, we really think that our Grandmother was laughing with us. She had a great sense of humor. We had all been so so serious for so many days. I think personally she was telling us to cut it out and enjoy life again. She enjoyed and relished every minute of life. She died right before Easter which was her favorite time of year. With Easter comes rebirth and new life with that the onset of Spring.

My grandmother had a knack for finding the best in people and the good in everything. She persevered and survived in the hardest of times and conditions. Yet she always smiled, never complained and loved life. I think she wanted to remind us of that.

In laughter and life I remember her,

Flash me and I will stop giving out samples!

When I was in high school several of us worked for a local grocery store that is still around today. This grocery store had a bakery where I worked and we actually made the cakes and breads and everything on premises. Today everything is shipped in unfortunately. I think I probably baked 25 thousand DOZEN of cookies while I worked there. I baked 500 dozen a week. It may be more. I am not good at math. If you wonder why I don't bake cookies that much today, there is your reason.

This grocery chain also had a pizza shop. They used to make the pizza fresh and put them out daily to sell to customers. Both the bakery and the pizza shop would put out fresh pizza and cookies for samples to get more customers to buy them to take them home.

Giving out samples is a ton of fun. You would not believe the people you would meet. It made for great gossip and we played games giving out samples. We watched the greedy people take more than one. The people who take one and then come back around 10 minutes later like they are new and take another one. Then there are the talkers who go on and on about how delicious whatever your serving is. We all enjoyed it.

Most of us youths worked the after school to closing shift. This was usually 4-9. We had a great time as we got to get the day old stuff and break it out for samples. We all became really good friends as the bakery, deli and pizza shop were all next to each other. The time clock was the same for all of us so we saw each other daily for breaks and clocking in and out.

Many many nights at 9 p.m. we would all meet in the parking lot and go out and 'party' after work. It was lots of fun. Even those that didn't have a shift that day would meet out in the parking lot at 9:15 especially on weekends.

Well one of those weekends we were going to meet, my friend was missing. I didn't think too much about it but it was odd. She was always there and she worked that night so I expected her even more. She was a no show though.

We all went to our usual place to play pool and goof off. We were sitting at a table chatting when in walks my friend. I asked her what happened and why she was so late. She said she had just come from the police department where she had been questioned. We all leaned in and wondered what in the world she had done.

Well she says, she went to work like normal. She had made a veggie pizza and had took it out of the oven and cut it up for samples. All of a sudden this man came up to get a sample. She offered him some pizza and he offered her something else lets just say and flashed her. Of course the minute she said flashing I was sent into hysterics. I am even laughing now thinking about it. I know, it was traumatic and it wasn't funny but it just cracked me up.

So anyway, she ran into the little pizza room they had for them and called up front and told the manager. Well apparently flasher had been around the whole supermarket and had already shown his goods to some other shoppers and employees.

Unfortunately there was another exit by the deli and my friend was his last victim and he exited out of the side entrance.

The police came and took everyone in for questioning and descriptions. She had to tell the story at the police station over and over again. That is why she was so late.

Flasher wasn't very smart as he didn't have a baseball cap on or any disguise and they quickly identified him and brought him in. My friend had to go back to the police station and stare at a line up and point him out All of the victims identified him and charges were pressed. He made a deal with the DA so it never went to court.

Come to find out flasher was a father in our town with two young kids. He obviously was mentally disturbed and had to go for therapy. I felt sorry for his wife and kids as I don't think they had any idea he was up to such nonsense.

The store made a new policy though and we were never allowed to give out samples again.

Hoping that is as close as I ever get to a flasher,

Living in Sin

Many people have asked me to blog about this so here goes.

Why do I not believe in living in sin? Simple. Why buy a cow if you can get free milk?

What is the difference? If you are dating and decide to move in with each other, what is the difference? Are you seriously telling me before you moved in together that you didn't know if you would get along? Do you really not know what side of the bed you want or how to cook a meal together? Do you really not know what brand toothpaste your partner uses or how they like their clothes washed? If you have been to the other persons place, you know whether they are neat or messy! What more do you need to know by living together? NOTHING.

I don't believe in living in sin. If you want to live together -- get married. I don't buy any excuse not to. Convenience etc are all lost on me. GET MARRIED if you need the convenience of living together. How hard is it?

If you are fighting before moving in, moving in will make the fighting worse. If you are getting along fine before moving in together, chances are you will probably get along fine once you are married and living together. Living together doesn't save you from divorce court. I bet if you lived together before you got married and did fine, you will do fine after you get married. And I don't believe for one second if you moved in with each other, that everything went down hill from there. I am sure it was already going down hill and moving in together was an attempt to try to keep it together. I just don't buy any of the excuses.

And to argue the other way, we moved in together and now we have been married 50 years. HELLO! You could be married 52 years if you would have done it the right way. Did you really have to live together to see that?

Sorry you are not selling me on this concept. I just don't get it. I don't care who does it, you are never going to make me think this is a good idea.

Not living in sin,

Preschool is stressing me out and I am 30 something!

I can tell this is going to be an interesting year. Plenty of blogging opportunities if last night was any indication.

We had our "parent only" preschool orientation and parent meet the teacher night. When the assembly was over and it was time to meet the teacher we proceeded to the classroom. The teacher had a brief presentation and gave us a tour of the room. At that time she asked if there were any questions.

Let me just preface this by saying last year I had "that mom" in my class. That mom haunted me all year long. She always said and did things that just drove me insane. That mom last year made a big stink when her child got sick and proceeded to tell the rest of us at the class valentines party that if our child was sick that she needed us to e-mail HER and let HER know so she would know who was responsible if her child got sick thereafter. I was so excited when at the meet the teacher I saw that mom go into the 3 day class and not the 4 day class. That mom was not going to be bothering me this year.

Ok back to the teacher asking if there are any questions. A few of us raised our hands and asked some questions about supplies, types of snacks, etc. And then wouldn't you know it, that mom reincarnated herself and became a part of the classroom this year. That mom noticed during the presentation that there was a writing center. Apparently that moms kid, little Johnny is a genius and can write his name and even wrote her a letter this week. She wanted to know based on this discovery how much writing would be done in the class on a daily basis. Well this sent me in a panic as my DD can barely write her name, forget anything else. Fortunately the teacher said that was the gist of it, writing their name and they really don't do anything but practice. That mom had a weird look on her face and I wondered if she was going to protest or withdraw her child that minute. We shall wait and see. I know I should be thrilled that DD is attending a school with a child prodigy and I should not be surprised, there is one in her class every year and now I will come to expect it.

Today was the first official day. I took in a huge packet of paperwork that I filled out only to be handed more. No wonder we are killing the environment with all this paper. I get so tired of paper work.

Then the money. I have already paid 2 months of tuition. Every time you turn around a school wants money. It is the PTA or the book club or this or that. I really wish that all schools would stop this nonsense. Just tell me an amount. I will write you a check. You will come out better in the long run and I can take it off my taxes as a donation. Then for the people who don't want to donate, you can nickle and dime them with all of these things. It would really simplify my life and yours.

The real thing that stressed me out was the take home project. I hate projects. Projects for a 4 year old means work for me. She cannot do it by herself. I have to help. I know it encourages parent/child time and that is a good thing. However, when it is on your time and your way, it stresses me out. See I am anal and I am a perfectionist so if I get a project that I know is going to be seen by everyone, I have to have it as perfect as I can do it with my child. So I have spent 48 hours obsessing over the perfect way to do this project and create it. Then I spent at least 2 hours with DD working on it. It is drying right now. Did I mention I hate crafts? I do. I am crafty apparently and I can do them, I just don't enjoy crafts. Glad this one is over.

The very best thing that did happen today was the teacher asked on her wish list for play-doh. That I can handle. Wal-Mart carried a nice 24 pack with a handle. Took me 5 minutes to run in and grab it and leave. Please send me more "to do" items like this!

Hoping to be craft-less the rest of the year,

I have a sickness - the falling sickness

I will tell you, if you are going to fall or trip, please do not do it in front of me or around me. I will laugh. I will make sure you are ok and will stop if you are hurt. However, if you are ok, I will probably laugh harder.

I am the most clumsy person you will ever meet. I have no reason at all to laugh because I will be next but let me tell you I will laugh at myself too.

This normally only occurred when I was young around family. Family falls, you laugh. My mom used to say at least once a year, falling is not funny. I just cannot help myself.

I was reminded of this recently when I went to a AA baseball game. This is really not funny and I told you, I just cannot help it. We were sitting in the second role behind home plate. Excellent seats. The kind you sit in and they flip up after you stand up and you have to push them down again. Well wouldn't you know the kid in front of me got excited at a play and jumped up. Then he went to sit down and sat on the ground as he forgot to put his seat down. He was about 12 but it doesn't matter what age you are, I am going to laugh. I was embarrassed too but I just cannot help it. I was laughing so hard I had to turn away and thought I was going to have to leave the stands. I was just waiting for his mom or dad to turn around and pop me one. The mother sitting next to me even looked at me oddly. I am sorry, it was funny to me. Every time I thought about it that night I would laugh a little and even now, it cracks me up.

One time I lost DH in Wal-Mart. I had sent him to go get a bottle of laundry detergent and he never returned. I was so mad. You know how you get when someone runs off in Wal-Mart and you cannot find them. Finally after calling his cell phone I reach him and tell him what aisle I am in. He returns with no laundry detergent. I said where have you been? Where is my Tide? Then I notice he is as white as a ghost and looks disheveled. I said what is wrong? He says I just wiped out in the detergent aisle. I said what? He says, someone must have busted open a bottle of liquid on the floor and I hit it and went flying down the aisle. By the time I recovered I just wanted to get out of there so I forgot your detergent and I am not going back down that aisle. Well by the time he gets to the end of that I am crying I am laughing so hard. Then he gets mad and wants to know why I am laughing. I said I am sorry that is funny and if you were really smart you should have laid there on the floor. We are in Wal-Mart, I could have owned it over that. Then I laughed the entire day every time I thought about DH sliding down the detergent aisle.

In college we used to have these big outdoor concerts on the lawn. They were free and we had some pretty good people come to sing. When going to one of these concerts with my friends to see Clint Black, we were walking on the lawn in front of the bleachers. They were filled with people. One of my friends all of a sudden was just on the ground. Out of no where. I was like what in the heck are you doing on the ground? She said I fell. Well that was enough to send me into hysterics. She got up and was fine and swears she stepped into some imaginary hole in the grass that none of the rest of us saw. She was so ticked that I laughed and of course all through the concert I would laugh every time I thought about it. I told you it is a sickness.

There was that time my father fell into the sting ray tank at Sea World. This was in 1982 the best I can remember and yet when I went to Sea World this year, I giggled as I remembered that. Falling imprints itself in my memory.

Laughing at the old falls till the next fall,